July 30, 2020 by Tany Minds

Bold / Proactive Child or Good Child |Quick advice|

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Bold / Proactive Child or Good Child? We meet different opinions about these skills.

  • I want to have a bold child, so I allow him to behave with other people as he wishes. He does not want to respect, it is his choice!

  • Or the other way around, I want a good child who respects people and I force him to apologize every two minutes for every little thing.

The extremes in this case do not lead to anything good.

In the first case, a child will grow up who will not love anyone, but neither himself!

And in the second case, an overly helpful child will grow up who will love everyone, except SELF!

In the relationship between the bold child and the good child, a balance is needed. Everyone should want a good child who is also proactive.

How can we have a proactive and good child at the same time?

  1. Encourage the child to communicate what he wants when the problem arises Not with us but with the person concerned.

    E.g:

    “Hello, I would like to play a little with your car, instead you can play with mine.”

    And we are the ones who, for the beginning, must help them to formulate their wish correctly, so that the conflict does not appear.

  2. Let’s explain its meaning, by examples, what those limits of behavior are.

    E.g:

    “It is not good to hit children. Let’s imagine, like your friend Samy, he will approach you right now and hit you with the car in the head, how will you feel? It will definitely hurt you and you will be angry with him, the same thing your friend will feel if you hit him “.

    The child has no way of knowing how far the limits of common sense are and takes them from the environment. As he understands them, and not necessarily correctly.

In conclusion:

Help your child to formulate the wish very clearly and correctly and encourage him to communicate it to the one with whom he has a common interest.

Explain to the child how far he can go with the wishes and exemplify each action. It is much easier for children to understand by example.

Last but not least, strengthen everything by your own example! The child will not do what we say if our words contradict what we do!

Photo credit: Tany Minds

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